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Looking for Answers

As most bibliophiles (such as myself) will tell you, if you can’t find the answer to someting, then look in a book. (Forget that whole Google thing!) But what happens when what you’re looking for can’t be found in a book? If it can’t be found on the Google? How do we find the answers that we are looking for?

Well, it used to be that we didn’t even have the Google to rely on. There were books for finding the answers to our questions. You know – encyclopedias! Crazy, right? But anyway, we now have the Google. And usually when there’s a question or the need of some random fact, I say, “Let us go to the Google!” But, the Google is not always helpful. In fact, sometimes you can get sucked into the Google and spend hours of mindless clicking, forgetting what it was you were originally searching for.

So in cases such as those, I turn to my most trusted sources – books. And no, not just encyclopedias. In fact, I don’t even own a set. (What happened to the days of salespeople coming to your door to sell you encyclopedias? One book at a time, of course.) Anyway, so I turn to books. And usually there’s at least one book that can provide a direction, if not an actual answer.

But recently (and not for the first time), I’ve been faced with questions that I don’t know where to find the answers. I’ve been forced to accept that there are many things we will just keep wondering about. I’ve had to face the fact that there are some people I can’t reach, some people that we don’t know what they’re thinking. I’ve had to realize that no matter how much I try/want to explain my side or perspective, that person does not want to hear it…they have already made up their mind. I’ve been forced to offer support to others who have the same questions I do, and many of those questions begin with “why?”

Why did that person feel like they were so alone? Why didn’t they realize I was here to help them? Why couldn’t they see how much they were loved? Why do I feel like I’m not good enough? Why do I have these secrets, this weight to carry? Why do I feel like my burdens are so heavy when others are more? Why won’t that person have a conversation that could allow us to better understand each other? Why is someone able to walk away despite the possibilites? Why are some people able to simply flip a switch and turn off their emotions? Why? Why? Why?

Why do I have to be the adult in a situation where I too am left with so many questions? How do I show those who are feeling the same way that they are loved and needed and appreciated? How do I know which ones are struggling each and every day? How do I see beyond the smile they put on for the world? How do I make a difference? How do I find the one that I can lean on as well? How do I unburden myself with the burdens that life brings? How do I find the right balance to not feel so weighed down? How do I explain that where we are now is not where we have been or where we are going? What can I do to show that I have so much more to give even if I’m still figuring out how?

So where can I find the answers to those tough questions in life? Where is the book with all of the answers in the back? I guess I’m still looking…If you find it, could you let me know?


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